Some people believe that children's leisure activities must be educational; otherwise they are a complete waste of time. Do you agree or disagree?

Essay topic: 
Some people believe that children's leisure activities must be educational; otherwise they are a complete waste of time.
Do you agree or disagree?
Today, there are some cotroversial debates over the most suitable leisure activity for children. While some argue that children should be engaged in more intelectual issues others are totally against it. In fact, both views have their benefits and drawbacks.
To begin with, some people put forward the view that it is of vital importance that children continue to acquire subjects reated to their education. This is due to the fact that they can grasp more information and skill in compare to adults. For example, learning a new language may seem difficult to many people. But that is not the case with children who are able to learn a foreign language quite easily. Thus, childhood could be the most suitable time to learn new languages, especially in leisure time in order to avoiding any waste of time. Another factor which is essential to point out is related to children's school subjects. Take for example a child who is weak in mathemathics. He or she can learn the subject more effectively by participating in extra classes during the leisure time or in the holidays.
On the other hand, others believe that it is neither necessary nor correct to force children spend their free time with educational issues. This idea is based on the belief that putting pressure on children will negatively contribute to their development. For instance, children can become more mature by doing different things ranging from playing music instruments to sports or just playing with their friends. Consequently, all these could have substantial positive impact on one's versatile developement.
I personally think that both ways are beneficial for children . As a matter of fact, a combination of two solutions can be the best way to pursue. This could be done by encouraging children to do either educational or recreational activities simultaneously in their free time.
In conclusion, we should probe to devise an appropriate plan that takes children's all-round development into consideration. We should provide precious opportunities for younger generation, so that they can gain benefits from activities with regard to intellectual, physical and mental education which allow them to excel.


Full essay evaluations
and skill in compare to adults.
and skill in comparison to adults.
Sentence: Today, there are some cotroversial debates over the most suitable leisure activity for children.
Error: cotroversial Suggestion: controversial
Sentence: While some argue that children should be engaged in more intelectual issues others are totally against it.
Error: intelectual Suggestion: intellectual
Sentence: To begin with, some people put forward the view that it is of vital importance that children continue to acquire subjects reated to their education.
Error: reated Suggestion: No alternate word
Sentence: Take for example a child who is weak in mathemathics.
Error: mathemathics Suggestion: mathematics
Sentence: Consequently, all these could have substantial positive impact on one's versatile developement.
Error: developement Suggestion: development
Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 7.5 out of 9
Category: Very Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 1 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 5 2
No. of Sentences: 20 15
No. of Words: 352 350
No. of Characters: 1799 1500
No. of Different Words: 207 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.331 4.7
Average Word Length: 5.111 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.821 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 127 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 100 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 73 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 46 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 17.6 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 5.463 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.6 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.278 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.502 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.058 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5